Chuck Norris in the field of typography

miha's picture

In the beginning was the Word. Then Chuck added other letters, numbers and signs.

Some letters are so afraid of Chuck Norris that they form ligatures.

FontLab never crashes for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can tell whether the font is Arial or Helvetica – blindfolded.

Chuck Norris can literally draw a space glyph.

Chuck Norris knows where the circle begins.

Chuck Norris doesn’t have to make spacing and kerning, glyphs do that themselves.

Chuck Norris can use zoom tool in FontLab up to the point where you can see specific atoms.

It’s better not to see typefaces as good or bad; there is just a list of permitted fonts allowed to be (ab)used. List made by you know who.

Chuck Norris doesn’t like children. That’s why Comic Sans is on that list.

Chuck Norris once started designing a typeface when he was drunk. That night the “w” was born.

Feel free to add other facts or image material.

Ed_Aranda's picture

Not exactly type-related, but in the same realm (a favorite, but not an original):

Chuck Norris can SPEAK Braille

Ed_Aranda's picture

Chuck Norris doesn't set type – he just throws all the letters together and expects each to know its role in his sentence.

Theunis de Jong's picture

Chuck Norris only creates one weight per font: Extra Bold.

Nick Shinn's picture

No flush left. Everything Chuck does is justified.

AlexanderKatt's picture

"Chuck Norris only creates one weight per font: Extra Bold."

...and then roundhouse-kicks it to create italic.

Frode Bo Helland's picture

Chuck Norris scared the Venetians straight.

Theunis de Jong's picture

Chuck Norris doesn't use the word "tittle".

kosal's picture

Chuck Norris whispers in all caps.

brockfrench's picture

Chuck Norris leaves widows and orphans in his wake.

dezcom's picture

Chuck Norris only makes kick-ass type.

mike_duggan's picture

Chuck Norris likes whole, not sub - pixels.

Theunis de Jong's picture

The industry had to abandon hot lead typesetting when Chuck Norris snorted it all up.

eliason's picture

Chuck Norris uses a three-story /a/.

John Lyttle's picture

Did you know that every question mark Chuck Norris designs is actually an interrobang‽

Theunis de Jong's picture

Chuck Norris makes wood type by biting bits off a tree.

Té Rowan's picture

Chuck Norris handcuts the mats... with his fingernails.

Ed_Aranda's picture

“Myriad” was aptly named following a demonstration of how many ways Chuck Norris can kill a man.

russellm's picture

Chuck Norris redesigned Helvetica. Now it actually is Switzerland.

Santiago Orozco's picture

Chuck Norris hinted Verdana by punching the monitor.

Justin_Ch's picture

Chuck Norris doesn’t need one of these:

He’ll letterpress your wedding invitations with his bare hands.

Frode Bo Helland's picture

Chuck Norris have intimate knowledge of Mrs. Eaves' bezier curves.

Frode Bo Helland's picture

Chuck Norris' bloodtype is woodtype.

Ed_Aranda's picture

Chuck Norris’ keyboard ...

Justin_Ch's picture

Chuck Norris can do embossing and die-cutting with an inkjet.

BlueStreak's picture

Chuck Norris doesn't work in the real world. All of his characters are fictional.

dezcom's picture

Chuck Norris can kick you in the nut fractions in< 1/4 of a second.

Ehague's picture

Robert Bringhurst returned from Chuck Norris's house with two stone tablets on which were inscribed the Elements of Typographic Style.

"Optically corrected," "monolinear" stroke widths look grotesquely modulated to Chuck Norris's perfect eyes.

Theunis de Jong's picture

The ellipsis was designed after the imprint of Chuck Norris' knuckles on the Trajan Column.

Ehague's picture

Chuck Norris once designed an eminently readable pixel font with a 1px cap height.

miha's picture

Chuck Norris once designed an eminently readable pixel font with a 1px cap height.
With subscript and superscript nicely done, of course.

Nick Shinn's picture

Chuck Norris once designed a hairline font so thin that only he could see it.

Ed_Aranda's picture

Chuck Norris successfully created a ligature that tells his entire life story, from conception to 5,000 years in the future.

Té Rowan's picture

A Chuck Norris glare is sufficient to uncrash any piece of software. Even Windows.

Arno Enslin's picture

Chuck Norris can jump over thousand lazy dogs at a stroke.

Spindly Bastard, Fat Bastard, Even Fatter Bastard, Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can smell the IP of font-file-sharers.

Theunis de Jong's picture

Any font recommended by Chuck Norris for a logo is the perfect choice. Any font at all.

Ed_Aranda's picture

Chuck Norris created the first two-story ‘a’ when he physically uppercutted his birth certificate at the sight of his name being mis-spelled “Chuck Narris”.

Arno Enslin's picture

Chuck Norris doesn’t punch cripples. So many serifs decided for self-amputation.

Té Rowan's picture

An Inserat is a Bold after a Chuck Norris slap.

Arno Enslin's picture

There is an Unicode point reserved for Chuck Norris’ DNA-ligature.

If Chuck Norris would be your teacher, you would delta hint your fonts, because you want to stay alive.

Chuck Norris can compile the OT features of Operina Pro with his brain.

Be grateful, that Chuck Norris allows you to use C, h, u, c, k, N, o, r, i and s.

Chuck Norris’ hairlines are extrablack.

Ed_Aranda's picture

All of the letters in Chuck's font have apertures — or as he likes to call them — “targets”.

peggo's picture

Chuck Norris create the entire alphabets on planet, then he manage the universal knowledge about all things. and I guess he don't need to know what we talk about him on this forum.. xD

Norbert Florendo's picture

Chuck Norris' em square is actually an octagon and his em dash is the longest ever seen.
When asked why is lowercase had no descenders he quipt "I go down for no one!"
He has a legendary sucker-punchcutter takedown and created the quaddbls to spell "ßßhit!"
Chuck can take a • to his head and † or ‡ can't pierce his flesh.

Reed Reibstein's picture

Chuck Norris designed a sans with serifs.

Chuck Norris can say "tittle" without laughing.

Chuck Norris can use a glyph palette in Photoshop.

Ed_Aranda's picture

Chuck Norris can use Comic Sans tastefully.

Ed_Aranda's picture

Chuck Norris refuses to say the word “Frutiger” — he prefers the more manly “Meatiger”.

Chuck Norris designed a font family with 1,000 weights, starting with Ultra Black.

Chuck Norris’ font is so bold ... How bold is it? ... It’s so bold, that when printed, it simply soaks your entire page in black ink.

fonthausen's picture

Chuck Norris uses a gun to make ball endings on serif faces

SciTechEngMath's picture

Chuck Norris’ font is so bold ... How bold is it? ... It’s so bold, that when printed, it simply soaks your entire page in black ink.

But, despite this, the resulting text is still both readable and legible.

Ehague's picture

The Gs in Chuck Norris's fonts have beards. So do all the other letters.

Ehague's picture

Chuck Norris once designed a font called Snell Roundhousekick.

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