•It’s a pretty solid concept, but the execution is lacking.
•The spacing pretty much stinks. Track out the caps, and just use Trajan instead of that initial font you’re using now.
•“May 31, 2009”, not “May 31st 2009”
•Use a heavier weight of Trade Gothic. Or better yet, use a warm humanist sans.
•Don’t run the ornaments into the edges and curves like that, it looks haphazard.
•Most Mothers-of-the-bride are going to be pretty pissed about lots of red on wedding invite if this is the bride’s first marriage and she doesn’t have kids.

This might be weird, or not, but what about Odile by Sibylle Hagmann? The upright italic is just quirky enough that is might work given the context.

Hi James,

Great comments. Okay the type looks good now, but I don't understand what you mean about not running the ornaments into the edges and curves...what would be the alternative for that if I want an all-over pattern?

I can live with a pissed off mother-of-the-bride however : )

Miss Tiffany,

i do like it, but can't afford it : )

This job is one of those where I am BARELY making a profit as it is. But I might try to get that for my next invite.

What do YOU think about the colors?

Moroccan saying: He who enters Fez with a rug, leaves with a money bag. :^)

maybe see more designs -- textiles, weaving etc. -- from Fez, Meknes, Wazan; since right now I don't see Morocco.

David,

Hmm not even Morocco modern? Do you have a link maybe?

thanks!

Okay guys...here is a new version incorporating comments...what do you think?

thanks!

The two weights of the sans to approximate small caps (the M and figures on the date line, for example) have to go.

Is the green paper final? Or is the Red ink final? And I agree about the small caps. I like the pattern, accept for the use of a dingbat for the flower.

the new pattern is much better

your red is more indian than morrocan

try to make it maybe dark red ....

dark red with green gives more morrocan impression

Thanks guys! I will kill the weird sans cap issue!

Last but not least is the heart shape of the bottom half coming across? And if not what can I do to make it more obvious?

Miss tiffany,

The green paper is not so much for the Moroccan part, but for the nature part...it is seed paper that you can plant...but it comes in other colors...I just wanted the nature part tie in...do you think I should change the color?

Also why don't you like the dingbat flower? I think it needs a flower or something organic to balance the nature part in there...do you have a suggestion for what would work better...should I illustrate a flower instead?

Yes, I think because you've spent the time drawing the rest you should make the last effort and draw a flower. Nothing fancy, you are right that simple is best.

The red and green as they are right now has me seeing Christmas. I agree that the red could be darker and even more earthy.

Is there a blue paper?

Miss Tiffany,

You are right..I found some great vintage clip art...I will upload again tonight. I changed the colors to Coral with pale pink paper... Check it out tonight and pls let me know what you think ; )

thanks!
Fiona

Huge improvement! Have you tried running an inkjet print on the final paper? I’m curious to see how it looks.

Definitely agree with the color. Something more earthy orange rather than solid red. I would say rain too but I think that was a random fluke for my trip last weekend ;-)

«El futuro es una línea tan fina que apenas nos damos cuenta de pintarla nosotros mismos». (La Luz Oscura, por Javier Guerrero)

Thanks guys...I will upload the final tonight and also run it on my inkjet again although I only have a swatch of the final paper and not enough to print it on that. I also added the organic/vintage element to the pattern and am curious if you think that works. I am certainly much happier with it after listening to everyone's comments...so thanks a lot!

Okay everyone...here is my final. Please give me your final thoughts. Thanks!

Quite nice overall!

Is it just the raster, or is the "3" preceding "PM" larger than the numerals in the date?

Traditionally, all caps should have looser tracking than this, improving readability. If you're at 0 now, I'd bring it up to 15 (or 10 or 20; use your best judgment).

Again, it could just be the small raster, but the bottom line looks slightly larger the preceding lines.

Lastly, the large numerals are unsettling for me. After adjusting the tracking on the words, I would reduce the size of the numerals so they cooperate a little more. Maybe that's just me though.

You've done a beautiful job with this piece! My comments are just details to bring it all together a bit more. (?)

Micro,

Good details though...the 3 was larger, but I didn't notice..good catch! Also you are right the all caps did look better at 10 than 0. Okay off to see the client! and thanks!

A big thank you to everyone for the wonderful feedback!

deborah risa mrantz

the xHeight relationships of all the typefaces are too inconsistent--disturbingly so. especially the arabic numerials which are disproportionately large. As well, the minimalist sans serif body face is at odds with, not complimentary to the Header face which is beautifully and subtly reminiscent of the the mid-eastern element. the internal proportions of the faces as they related to each other are off—work toward a golden mean.

Deborah,

Hmm I had already fixed the x-height issue.

I know what a golden mean is, but not how to use it here.

I see what you mean about the proportions of the counter space in the letters not being similar. That is very interesting and I had not thought of considering that when combining typefaces...but I will from now on so thanks for that. If you care to elaborate on the golden mean comment I am all ears.