!Help!: Student Project Advice

vestanpance's picture

Hello,

I was wondering if any of you out there can give a few sugestions on how to improve on this design. We have to use the word "Composition" and give the definition. The definition can be in any font, but the word "Composition" has to be in either Helvetica Black or Arial Black.

This is due on wednesday and my professor ran out of time toady to give me any kind of solid feedback. Given his "No artwork emails" policy I am feeling frustrated about a good direction to move in. The only critique that he managed to offer was that "the word 'Composition' and the definition are crammed into the space there. And to explore more use of the unlimited typfaces avaliable for the definition.

Here's the link and I appreciate any helpful tips or direction to explore!

Thank you,
Sean-Paul



Composition Art

cjg's picture

I like the interaction between the overlapping Cs on the left, but it feels to me that the lines of text are being swallowed

addison's picture

To me, your definition is competing with the large overlapping Cs. Because they (the big Cs) create a wonderful, lively shape that dominates the format, perhaps your definition could be something more subdued and orderly for more contrast. You've got big to small, now maybe try chaos to order (but always allow one to dominate).

I think I would lose the gray and work only with black and white. Only reintroduce the gray if you really need it.

It's very nice overall. You're a much better student than I was...

-Addison

aluminum's picture

What kind of design course inflicts Arial on the students?

vestanpance's picture

Thanks to all for your input. I got some good ideas and interesting directions to look at.

@Darrell: The kind of teacher that tells us his experience of design school consisted of staying up all night to make a design "perfect" simply to avoid the wrath of his Prof. And on other days, to have the same prof snatch student work off the board during crtiques and expediently shred it before all to see, saving the world from yet another horrificly designed catastrophe. It's pay back time I guess >:-)

madtodd's picture

do you by chance go to university of cincinnati - my wife and i endured many a public hangings there during design critiques.

as far as the fonts go good luck - i think you have a great design. if you're feeling devilish then you may want to do the definition in a bold script to really blow his mind.

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