if you could have it done...

nkwiatek's picture

Hey dudes, I've been doing some soul searching and I came up with two questions that I'm hoping will give you a quick fantasy break:

First, who's your dream employer? Assuming, of course, the job would be at least LOOSELY based in typography -- although I'm sure doing work for Rob Halford would, indeed, be pretty f-ing sweet. Oh and kudos if the answer is "myself."

Second -- and I'm really excited to hear what you have to say on this one -- if you could have any typeface made (or , if you prefer, you could have infinite time to draw and dote over one yourself) -- what would it be?


Endre Berentzen's picture

Dream employer(s): Vince Frost, Made thought, Hoefler & Frere-Jones

Dream typeface: Will have to wait until the technology catches up but (after research by specialists outside the typefield: Neurologists, psychology etc.) a typeface that would make it easier for dyslexics to read (One that is adjusted individually to the needs of the specific person - adjusted by a new preference possibility in Open type 4.0 or something down that track;-)

fontplayer's picture

First, who’s your dream employer?

The guy who's gonna recognize all the potential I have, and buy me a motor home with a Power Mac and satellite dish, and pay me to travel around the county taking photos and doing fontplays. And underwrite any workshops I'd like to enroll in.

He would also buy me the complete font collections of all the foundries, and a staff to organize them, so I could find the perfect font for what I am doing at all times.

He would also want me to test all the latest electronic gizmos, and would provide a credit card for that purpose.

Wanting me to be relaxed at all times, one of my staff would double as a massage therapist.

(If this sounds like you, you can contact me on my profile page).
; )

Endre Berentzen's picture

Or I could say it like Dennis just did. I will never be satisfied with a job ever again now that I have seen the ideal. Thanks alot Dennis;-)

fontplayer's picture

He did say dream job. No sense skimping on that exercise.
; )

nkwiatek's picture

>> a typeface that would make it easier for dyslexics to read

Yes, that would be awesome. My roommate is dyslexic... hmmm....

>> He did say dream job

I totally buy it. I'm surprised you didn't mention unlimited vacation time

fontplayer's picture

I’m surprised you didn’t mention unlimited vacation time

If I had that dream job, what would I do for vacation? Stop having fun? Vacation would probably resemble my job. Except maybe I'd do it in Italy, Ireland, ...you know, someplace where they talk funny.

Endre Berentzen's picture

Like here in Norway Dennis. We talk funny;o)

blank's picture

I’m pretty sure that my dream employer is a version of myself, but one that actually gets out of bed on time and can remember to keep a schedule.

As for the type, well, I did dream one up and I’m (slowly) working on it.

John Hudson's picture

My dream employer is the Vatican, but the job has nothing to do with typography. In the dream, I am the Holy See's official consultant to the makers of horror films, charged with ensuring that their plots are theologically consistent. The only trouble with the dream is that I don't actually like horror films, but of those I have seen only a very few have presented a consistent, thorough theological worldview, the absence of which undermines scariness by making me giggle.

Nick Shinn's picture

Never mind theological consistency, simple math does the trick:

nkwiatek's picture

come on now, john. nothing's scarier than a plot hole.

jp, what's your idea?

BlueStreak's picture

This doesn't have anything to do with typography. It is a classic answer to the basic question though. The following is from the movie "Office Space" and will maybe offer a brief comedic break...

Peter: Our high school guidance counselor used to ask us what you'd do if you had a million dollars and you didn't have to work. And invariably what you'd say was supposed to be your career. So, if you wanted to fix old cars then you're supposed to be an auto mechanic.

Samir: So what did you say?

Peter: I never had an answer. I guess that's why I'm working at Initech.

Michael: No, you're working at Initech because that question is bull"stuff" to begin with. If everyone listened to her, there'd be no janitors, because no one would clean "stuff" up if they had a million dollars.

Peter: What would you do if you had a million dollars?

Lawrence: I'll tell you what I'd do, man: two chicks at the same time, man.

Peter: That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time?

Lawrence: Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I were a millionaire I could hook that up, too; 'cause chicks dig dudes with money.

Peter Gibbons: Well, not all chicks.

Lawrence: Well, the type of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me do.

Peter: Good point.

Lawrence: Well, what about you now? what would you do?

Peter: Besides two chicks at the same time?

Lawrence: Well, yeah.

Peter: Nothing.

Lawrence: Nothing, huh?

Peter: I would relax... I would sit on my ass all day... I would do nothing.

Lawrence: Well, you don't need a million dollars to do nothing, man. Take a look at my cousin: he's broke, don't do "stuff."

fontplayer's picture

With me a million bucks would be gone in no time.

Art and quote by me. Font changed to Note to Self by Dinc, to match the artwork better.

blank's picture

jp, what’s your idea?

I am working on a slightly slanted sans-serif with round corners inspired by Boeing jets. At this point it’s very much a back-burner project because I lack the skills to pull it off; I think it will end up being a 16-year project like Beorcana. I also wanted to do a simpler sans, something along the lines of a grotesque or a contemporary design, so I made that my senior thesis.

Endre Berentzen's picture

James, I would love to see some sketches in the critique section of this new typeface. Sounds interesting. Gave me a good idea for some italics: Concorde.

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