Crit some potential portfolio pieces

blank's picture

Following are links to two projects I did this semester that I want to touch up and put into my portfolio. The first is a magazine article, the second is a series of proposed layouts for the AIGA/Aquent salary guide Modem users beware, the salary guide is just over a meg. Please look them over and provide feedback.

Quincunx's picture

Could be me, but it seems that the candy photo is not too sharp. :)

ill sans's picture

Nice use of colours on the candy project!

timd's picture

For the salary guide I would suggest that you make the top and bottom white areas equal for each level of hierarchy and the same for the tables and similarly for some of the left and right margins; align the page numbers on the contents page, there is no point making it more difficult for the reader; the AIGA logo seems to be bleeding off the edge of the white box; the tables might be easier to follow if the three major divisions were slightly more divided (I mean that the spaces between the Salary/Wages columns and the Total Compensation columns were wider than the space between 25th% and Median, for example), btw the heading for the client base table needs an uppercase W. I am not familiar with the 25th% and 75th%, what does it mean? You could also look at ranging the figures and column heads to a righthand tab, this is especially important for the size of organisation table where you have 6-digit numbers above 5-digit. The spaces between tables should also be equal. The graph on page 3 might need some kind of legend for the upright axis. Finally, the general design is attractive, it is a shame that the gummi bears shot is out of focus.

The magazine layouts: on the title page the running foot is partially invisible against the dark background; on the facing page the 1 might be better if it were overhanging the column, I might also work on it to make it clear it is a numeral, I read it as I; I wonder if the pullout on the second spread is redundant (or at least in the wrong place), the article might read better if the paragraph starting “Most Christians imagine…" were taken over to the second spread, while the paragraphs above were taken down to make a clear differentiation between the introductory passage and the body copy; the pullout could work between points 2 and 3; especially on the second spread there is opportunity to clean up the rag, just a few turnovers will improve it; I am not clear about the image is it the author?

Hope I've not given you too much to think about over the holidays.


blank's picture

Thanks Tim! I can't have too much to think about—none of my classes even starts until the 19th, so I have a lot of time to kill.

Eric_West's picture

Hope none of your potential employers are Christian.

feldhouse's picture

I agree with Eric. Think about your audience.

In terms of the first PDF's design layout, break the grid a bit. It seems a bit unbalanced with the photo flush on the verso page and the large space on the recto page on the right side. Your "old style" call-out for the first letter doesn't work at all. You start with "O"ne ... but then you start to numbers "1" If... It doesn't flow at all and the whole notion of calling out the first letter in a paragraph is so old school and boring. I would try something more fresh and innovative. Your text is also not agreeing with the layout. Its layout is too clean for this type of content. Expressive layouts might work better. I'd recommend "Making and breaking the grid" by Timothy Samara.

The second PDF layout is alright. I think the photos are too dominate and might need to be scaled back a bit somehow. On the front page, you might want to try aligning the AIGA logo box to one of the "boxes" of candy or something like that. It might make it more interesting and feel like it's thought out.

Best of luck next semester with these projects. I'd be interested to see how much these change.

blank's picture

Hope none of your potential employers are Christian.

Good point. I'll just stick that one on a shelf somewhere.

Syndicate content Syndicate content