The overall concept is appealing, but I find the lower right (kids and building), elements to be far too busy. They distract from the upper left element which, I assume, is intended to be the focus of the page. Also, the composition of the kids' photos leaves something to be desired... They have the appearance of simple snapshots.
D~
Much stronger than your previous post. I would look at moving the through song to the left to put all the copy on the purple, this might mean reducing the size slightly and possibly the leading so it can range right on the angle. On the images the borders need to be the same weight and possibly the cream colour and if you can increase the size of the two boys so it is not obvious that it is the same image (how stupid will I look if they are different images?). Unfortunately the choir looks seriously under resolution if you can't get better you might try adding a little noise.
Tim
Since it does appear that the children represent two halves of the same whole, have you considered moving the choir to the top triangle and having the children on opposing sides joined by the notebook in the middle? It would be as if they're looking at the choir and smiling. You'll have to raise the purple section a bit, but it would be more balanced.
3 Nov 2005 — 9:43am
The overall concept is appealing, but I find the lower right (kids and building), elements to be far too busy. They distract from the upper left element which, I assume, is intended to be the focus of the page. Also, the composition of the kids' photos leaves something to be desired... They have the appearance of simple snapshots.
D~
3 Nov 2005 — 9:53am
Much stronger than your previous post. I would look at moving the through song to the left to put all the copy on the purple, this might mean reducing the size slightly and possibly the leading so it can range right on the angle. On the images the borders need to be the same weight and possibly the cream colour and if you can increase the size of the two boys so it is not obvious that it is the same image (how stupid will I look if they are different images?). Unfortunately the choir looks seriously under resolution if you can't get better you might try adding a little noise.
Tim
4 Nov 2005 — 12:47pm
Since it does appear that the children represent two halves of the same whole, have you considered moving the choir to the top triangle and having the children on opposing sides joined by the notebook in the middle? It would be as if they're looking at the choir and smiling. You'll have to raise the purple section a bit, but it would be more balanced.
I like the basic design, just a simple change.